Yep! I'm still here! Although, I must confess, that my heart for Seven has been on the backburner this week. God has been nudging me ever so relentlessly, and I've been ignoring Him.
A week ago, I spoke with a man who helps the local homeless. I mean the real homeless. We're in a suburban / agricultural county with a relatively low percentage of homeless people in the population. But they're out there, in tents or on sidewalks, and I know this. The thoughts of helping them somehow, but not knowing where to start has been annoying, depressing, frustrating......
And this week, no matter what "week" it was, I failed. I failed to follow God's call to help them, to feed them, to clothe them. I failed to pray for them, other than my meek thoughts for them. Here's the true account of my Seven week:
I somewhat successfully made it through possessions, and the plan was to do clothes next. I didn't. Plain and simple. I thought all week long about why. Early on, I thought perhaps I could've switched it up to make it food week? I didn't.
During this week, I had a birthday, complete with gift cards to buy new clothes with, and my favorite birthday dinner of pigs-in-a-blanket and mac-n-cheese (I'm not a fancy gal), followed by my first taste of pink-lemonade cake...yum. My kids brought me breakfast in bed. So, I ate extra junk food, and brought home more clothes.
Our local homeschool convention was this weekend. I spent all of my budgeted money on curriculum, and I still
I've not had a single quiet time this week. BIGGEST FAIL.
I have friends, sweet friends, one I know rather well who has quite the testimony for Jesus, and the BIGGEST heart ever, I tell ya, and another who I went to high school with many moons ago. We had fun times together back then, but lost touch after school. We've recently connected on FB, she's a Sevener as well, and local here still. Both of these ladies have been poking me, whether they realize it or not. "Donna, what are we going to do to help these people?" "Listen to what I discovered about myself during this Seven week." I have put it all on hold, and for what? Cake and clothes? Well, not entirely. More realistically, for life. This worldly, American, social life. For little ol' selfish me!
Here's what I've learned about myself this week. First, no matter how much praying I do for the hungry, if I don't ready myself to receive God's voice, I'll never hear Him. Second, if I don't hear Him, I'll never do His will. I'll not be His hands and feet. I'll never find the way to feed and clothe these people. Third, I must not get caught up in myself. I think this is my biggest problem. I''ve been in a constant, what-I-want-right-now mode.
The good news? After this depressing post, you probably didn't expect any at this point did you? But its here, the silver lining, if you will. The good news is that I know this about myself. I know what God expects of me, and I realize that the expectation is a WHOLE LOT more than what I've been giving Him.
So, I'm calling this next week my SELF week. Everyday, I'll work on some way to reduce my thoughts and desires of myself by actively helping others. Selfless acts are not my strong point, OBVIOUSLY you now know this. It will be difficult for me, but I'll update posts as the week unfolds.
Life happens all around us, but its up to us not to get caught up in what doesn't matter. We are to focus on The Lord, at all times, no matter what season we're in.